Feb 26, 2012

Style Outsider returns baby!

Often on this blog I have used sexual humor as a way in which to convey the silliness that I often feel, however for this one post i'm going to stay as straight-faced as possible. There's a reason for this, and the reason: being a style outsider. I came up with this term as a way in which to describe the emotions I felt during my middle school years. It was a phrase that often evoked the connotations of Ducky or Andy from pretty in pink, or Rayane Graff from my so-called life. Characters who influenced my style, my persona, and even the way in which I conducted myself in public. However, as I reach the end of my junior year I find myself slowly losing that person, a child who wore outfits which would make a nun cry. Maybe it's sentimentality, or simply a desire for an easier life, but looking back at this blog I realize how much I miss writing the sexually infused, humor-less posts on style and life.
So here's the conclusion of this mini-post: I'm back. I apologize for my absence, and I ask that you, the reader, if you even exist at this point, to pretend that I simply went on a vacation to fashion land and came back with hands full of sheer shirts, and bold printed pants.

Jan 7, 2012

Style inspiratin


Marry me?
But not seriously?
Oh... that's right... I am gay...
Um...
Marry me?
Eliza from the Trashicist.

Oct 26, 2011

Ey


I'm not dead.

Oct 15, 2011

Sexy Things To Do Sexy Things With... SEXY

Some items of sexual interest that you might want to know about:BOW TIES! That's right, wearing these material concoctions will instantly increase your boner capabilities! Think of all the underground wood you will create if you don these things! Sexy power person! Sexy Lawyer! Sexy fashion designer! GOD! The possibility of sexy is endless!
(ALSO ALBER ELBAZ IS A STUD. A beautiful, beautiful, beautiful stud that drapes like no ones business!)


If you're MIKA, you are sexy. Sorry other people, this really only extends to him... BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME!


Some sexy Jeffery Campbell wedges! (STILL NOT OVER THE SEXY GRANDMA PATTERN! I WANT TO WEAR A COUCH ON MY FEET, OKAY!) And let’s not even get started on these astro galaxy fantasias! It's like a spaceman took some fun filled photos on his Polaroid camera up in space and made them into shoes. STUDLY.

Grey hair on younging's is SEXY! Period.

Oct 12, 2011

GURL! YEAH YOU GURL! It's cold...

My baby Jesus mother winter is coming early this year! What is a style outsider do to? (I mean come on sweaters, SO mainstream!) My go-to winter outfit is a coat... BELTED! Ground breaking, I know. However, if you really want to add some outsider-ness into your look get a bejweled sweeter! Preferably one from the 80's! The sex appeal! Instant boner right there. (The boner will defiantly intensify if you have the jewels on your chest area... OKAY boobs! Happy? Jeez! You're so demanding your perverted interwebz monsters.)


This photo reads, "My baby Jesus, it's cold in this room! 80 degrees? FREEZING! Better cover myself up in a thrifted coat!" It also reads, "JEEZ DOES THIS KID EVER CLEAN HIS ROOM?" The answer to that question is no. NEVER! NEVER I SAY!


Ya like those man boobs? WELL YOU SHOULDN'T! I'm underage! You wonderful pedophile you, (so going to lose all my readers after this post)

Some fun details for you to feast your fashion starved eyes on! DETAIL ORGY RIGHT HERE!

My mom's reaction to my fun loving shoe choice:
"Erik?"
"Yes mumzy?"
"Cowboy boots do not work with that outfit!"
"But mom! I need to recreate brokeback mountain!"
"Sigh... Whatever, get out of here you badazled homosexual genie."
LOVE YOU MOM!
Even more schmexy detail orgys. Look at all those sparkles... SPARKLES!

P.s all thrifted items.

Oct 8, 2011

Erik Likes Sarcasm

Warning: Erik has not slept in twenty four hours= terrible humor.




What have we learned from these videos? Well okay,
firstly WEED (or Mary Jane if your a fancy person) will cause incest!!!!!!!! YOU'VE BEEN WARNED! Also... don't drive high! Yep, protecting the young. Go me.
Unicornx2, yeah that's right, i'm making words to count with! What? You don't do that, oh... Well you should! Building ramps will cause homosexuality.... SEXY! Ya know you want to get your best mate and make some sweet same-sex love!
Thirdly , dancing causes steamy hot make out sessions! (wait till the end to see their fun filled lip-locking session. Or you can skip to that part... BUT THEN YOU'D BE CHEATING YOU POOP!) Ya hear that you sexually frustrated teenagers, get your CRUSH to dance with you and boom! BABIES! Fun.
Fourthly, Beyonce is preggers! But then she's not... REVERSED PREGNANCY IS ONLY POSSIBLE IN NEON COLORS!
Fifthly, Cholas once ran for president... YOU GO GURLS! YOU WEAR THAT SEXY WHITE EYE LINER!
...
Goodnight lovely interwebers, and mom.

Oct 5, 2011

It's Like A Wet Dream... EXCEPT IT'S A DREAM THAT KEEPS ON GIVING!!

Haider Ackermann... Haider Ackermann... HAIDER ACKERMANN.... Omg stop being so damn studly you columbian hunk! JEEZ! It's like you want me to spend my piggy bank money on your clothes, because that's what i'm going to have to do! I mean have you seen this collection!? It's like a sexy lady meets a sexy creeper meets a sexy make shift grandma who meets a panda who falls in love with a whale and produces a mermaid! I'm really sorry you had to read that...
I can't really describe my feelings right now, at first I cried, then I cried some more. After that tear session I got some Cheetos and viewed again, (more tears ensued). There's something so beautiful and simple about Haider, (AKA god of my world at the moment) that is just BREATHTAKING! Maybe it's the fact that his clothes are made with such emotion... I don't know... I'M IN LOVE OKAY! Don't judge!